Just another Kaifeng morning...

“Oh, who is that, rushing on his bicycle through the hutong, almost knocking-off the baozi stand?! Is that little Zhao, or the beautiful yet humble Mei-li? Oh no, that’s 光华. Probably late for class again. He comes from that faraway land where they talk Arabic and fight all the time... you know, somewhere next to Pakistan. I heard from old-man Zhang that he’s been taking his showers at the campus pool, and noise-hard-sound-loud sucking on noodles like there is no tomorrow – so cute, he thinks he’s Chinese! He was so happy to settle in Kaifeng, but seems he will have to schlep soon all the way to Shanghai or Beijing, exactly the monster-cities he has ran away from. No, it's not tourism – he has seen the Wall, as well as the Forbidden City, and couldn’t really care for Shanghai… it’s the visa stuff that urging. Ha-ha-ha, these funny foreigners! How they stream-strong-river-long rush into our Middle Kingdom, without even looking at their papers before that. Yes, he has initially spent three weeks in Beijing, enough time to renew his passport 7 times (not to mention a year and a half back home before that, where he wouldn’t have to pay 450 rmb for issuing a new one). Must have been too busy learning useless literary Chinese vocabulary, or yelling ‘I don’t eat meat, I don’t meat!’ at amazed waiters, to take a look at his passport, just this short little glimpse, and realizing ‘hey, I got no pages left’. Guess those Jews are not as smart as we made them to be after all. Get the 'Jewish Secrets for Making Money' and 'How Smart Jews Control the World' books off the shelves, and put some more of the good old Mao and Deng stuff! Oh, what a wonderful Chinese-style socialism did we build here, what a thriving economy, what an initiative society. Ten-thousand years for Chairman Hu! Ten-thousand miles for stupid Zohar”